Red sky at night, sailor’s delight. Red sky in morning, sailor’s warning

The sailor's warning.  Translated into my world: No phone calls at night, mommy's delight. First text message before 7 in the morning - oh fuck, find a desk to hide under.

Accurate? Discuss....

Hair Glitter and Pocoyo

There are mornings that I wonder if a camera has been secretly outfitted in our apartment. 

I woke up this morning for my “me time” and planted myself in front of the television.  My only goal was to finish the most recent episodes of “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills”, say what you will about reality TV, but I can absolutely relate to these ladies…  I mean if you take away the idea they live in Beverly Hills (which most of them don’t) and are rich (most of them aren’t) then there are things about each of the ladies that I can appreciate.  Adrianne’s definitely my favorite – except for that hair glitter?  Why?  I don’t get it.

During the commercial, a little after 7, I go into Iolani’s room to find her cuddled up to Moe.  Not wanting to disturb her too much (because I’m still in the middle of the show and it only takes about 20 minutes to get her out the door), I cover her up and tiptoe out.

However, by the time I’ve made it back to the couch, the little sneaky bugger has slipped up to the couch and is now asking for Pocoyo.  Fucking Pocoyo…please…let me finish my show.  “Mommy wants to finish her show and then we will watch Pocoyo” I say.

We finish my show, and I ask her what she wants for breakfast.  “Nothing” she says.  Maybe too much Housewives as my daughter is already thinking about skipping breakfast?  Ah, have no fear…Iolani saw a little microwave dinner, she points out that she wants that…  Spaghetti for breakfast it is.

Why am I being so accommodating this morning?  Spaghetti for breakfast?

Picture Day!!!!

Alex and I needed Iolani in nice clothes for school.  We needed her to ditch her Toy Story/Yo Gabba Gabba/Elmo stained shirts that she usually demands to wear – for a clean tunic.  You know, preferably something her grandmother (Lola) has purchased for her.

As Pocoyo has mesmerized our child, I slip on the purple top, clean pants, socks, shoes…and I comb her hair, she’s touting the joys of Pocoyo.  At this point, I don’t fucking care what’s up on the TV show – I’m just happy she isn’t shouting “I don’t want to wear this!!!!!”

And, with that – I get us out the door.  We are nearly halfway to the elevator when Iolani announces she needs a cup for school.  She doesn’t need a cup for school, she has 3 at school right now.  However, not to be deterred, she stomps her feet and proclaims: 


Holy shit, the girl needs a cup.  We run back to the house, she looks for the damn Woody cup and figures out that it is indeed at school.  She picks another cup, asks for “temonade” (ahhh, how cute)…which we have very little of.  (Grocery night is needed)

Back to the car.  She gets in, I buckle her into her seat.  I get into my seat and remember the days I used to slip into my seat and turn on blaring Green Day.  Today – I now keep the radio off in an effort to have my last bits of communication with Iolani before she heads into school.

The whole drive to work was about Moe the Bear hitting her.  Rather than hit back, I’ve been trying to teach her to point her finger and say – I don’t like that.

I can’t wait for the day that I tell her no to something, and she waves her finger back at me and says – No, I don’t like that.  Half of me is being sarcastic, but I’ll trade that for a fall-to-the-floor-wail-for-$1200 purse tantrum at Nordstroms.  (and just to clarify…Iolani would be the one falling to the floor.  I no longer throw a tantrum for $1200 purses, New Years Resolution you know)

We get into school, all settled in.  No tears, no hugs.  She leans in to kiss me with spaghetti half hanging out her mouth.  Yes….  I did hesitate for the morning kiss.  I’ve kissed worse things in the morning, so I doubled back to kiss my daughter goodbye.  I asked the teacher what time pictures would be taken.

Her reply: Picture day is tomorrow.

Panties in a bunch...that's me!

Can I just say "what total crap" and move on?  No.  I can't.  I can say - what an incomplete, half-assed article.  I love Tricia, she's a neighbor, her daughter is almost two months older than mine…but this article is total crap and fails…FAILS to paint the full picture of the Family Situation in Downtown Los Angeles.

And, I'm going to tell you why. (and listen Richard…nothing personal, but I know Downtown News can spare the space…you missed a key point)

Housing prices, specifically rental prices.

Take note: Overall average rental prices did go down between 2009 and 2010, but the average rental prices for two bedroom units did not experience the same kind of dramatic fall. (

Rental prices have increased for both one and two bedroom apartments in Los Angeles - but the rate of increase between one to two bedrooms is more significant.

Meaning - there's a need for two bedroom places, there's not enough rental housing stock for families. 

If you are a City of Los Angeles family that needs more than two bedrooms, you are just utterly and completely screwed. Screwed…as the average rental rate for a 3 bedroom unit is over $3,000 a month…and there's only about 146 of those available.  Two bedrooms: Average is about $2500.

In our neighborhood, Rentometer says that we should expect to pay $2800 a month for our two bedroom apartment.  Thank you to Pegasus…we pay under that.  We have seen the units that run for $2300, $2500, $2800 and higher…we cannot afford to live in a place for more than $2300 a month.  And, we are a two income, white collar household.  

There are plenty of DTLA families who purchased their units - they cannot just up and move. Either because they lack any equity in their mortgage and cannot sell their unit, or they truly love their neighborhood and they've made a commitment to make it all work out.

Additionally - you have to ask why parents are moving to the better LAUSD schools.  I understand that individual schools haven't been rock star schools forever.  Parents, students, administrators and teachers before us made a commitment to making that school the way it is.  There's a school in our backyard that is poised to repeat that track.  Why not be a part of it?

Housing prices, regardless of where you are at in the City of Los Angeles is breaking the back of her residents. My husband and I know plenty of people who have not just moved from DTLA because of schools…they are moving because the higher value of the housing stock, neighborhood, and the entire school district.  (Looking at you La Canada Flintridge, Pasadena, and South Pasadena)

So, Richard…you missed something.  People aren't leaving >just< because we lack a Cheremoya, Solano, Allesando, or an Ivanhoe today, doesn't mean we can't have one tomorrow.  Parents are leaving because they are getting priced out of the neighborhood, overall concern regarding LAUSD, and other likely more personal preferences and beliefs. 

I should just stop right there...but ANOTHER THING, if there are so few families and children in DTLA, why is the Kid City South Park program FULL?  Why was the Biltmore Hotel's Gingerbread Man thing...FULL.  Why was the CCA's halloween event FULL. When Little Tokyo hosted two Yo Gabba Gabba episodes...PACKED!   There are a lot of kids in DTLA...the kids in the neighborhood are not clumped together in the Hipster Heaven Historic Core (You know I love you guys) or even the Financial District...they are stuffed in overcrowded apartments in South Park.  There are well over 500 children in South Park.  There's a big reason why the survey completed didn't catch that...the survey was only available in English.  Maybe next time the survey is done, add in a couple of Korean, Spanish, or even Japanese copies and see what comes back.'ll see that we will still have a market for Target, Nordstrom Rack, Petco, and a motherfucking Gymboree.

See...I almost went the whole blog entry without a potty word.  Fuck it...I need a nap.